


All the Kings Men

by imdex



Series: You Know the Rules [4]
Category: Elder Scrolls, Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
Genre: Altmer - Freeform, F/M, Fluff, Funny, Rescue, Swordfighting, Thalmor, stuck in a tree
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-09
Updated: 2016-05-10
Packaged: 2018-06-07 10:53:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,993
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6800776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imdex/pseuds/imdex
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"You're scared of heights!"<br/>"I am no such thing!"<br/>He would never admit it, and she would be silenced the moment conversation went in the <i>abhorrent</i> direction in the future, but the moment his hand gripped the sword was the moment he lost balance.<br/>The moment he found himself clinging madly with one hand to the branch, the moment birds flew from their nearby perches and the Breton below was effectively taken down to her knees in tears.</p><p>Rulindil had <i>screamed</i>.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Heights

**Author's Note:**

> @SoftlyTea is a genius. Also I don't know how to tag people. I giggled the entire time I wrote this. I welcome you to give this a shot, too, if you'd like my friend!
> 
> Most all of my stories are the titles of my favorite songs.   
> All the Kings Men is owned(and beautifully done) by The Rigs  
> Rulindil belongs to Bethesda.

"Hey Dragon?" He frowned and bit the inside of his cheek.  
"Are you coming back down or is the view that great?" Rulindil licked his lips.  
"Silence, Breton. I'm…" Concentrating? Looking at something more interesting than you? Haven't found the sword? 

Rulindil felt a bead of sweat trail down his temple and he dared to glance down, refusing to acknowledge the tightening of his limbs around the branch he was practically glued to, also refusing to spout off any of the previous lies he had scrambled to think of. Imani looked up at him curiously and from what he read on her face some jealously as she assumed he was truly taking in some sort of beautiful view. While the latter was true as he looked at her the reasons for him staying put in the tree wasn't for the view. 

He had been teaching her how to sword fight in the spare time he had, when they weren't 'fighting' in a horizontal manner, and she had improved greatly. The fact that it had taken a few dozen lessons was beside the point. She had gotten a bit too into their lesson and in her back swing had sent her wooden sword flying into a tree. _This only happens with her_ he mused with some mirth as he observed the Breton, whom at that point in time had turned on her heels and was practically stomping her feet and flailing her arms in irritation, as strings of disbelieving insults poured from her as she finally located the sword in a high limb of the offending tree. 

After a few miserably failed attempts at scaling the 'sword stealing' pine Imani had turned to him with that damned look on her face, slightly pouted lip, and pointed up. At first he had put up a front as he had explained it was her fault therefore her responsibility to retrieve the weapon but she had pointed out that he was the taller of the two and could easily reach that first branch that would start the climb up. Rulindil had considered for a fleeting moment lifting her so she could do so herself but then she had poked his pride, damn her for knowing what to say, and damn his foolhardy confidence for not backing down.

"Are you _scared_ or something?" a sly look came over her features and he bristled. Rulindil shrugged off his robe and flung it at the Breton, some cool comment warning her not to get his robes dirty falling on deaf ears. The Altmer scaled the tree easily enough and the sword was within arms reach but as he started to reach for the childish piece of wood,-whose carved heart containing ' _R+I 4ever_ ' shown up at him mockingly, was when a sparrow flew by. 

And that damned bird, that cute 'squeaky' bird as Imani called them, took with it the determination he had contrived and sweet talked into lingering in his limbs and mind. 

He missed her squint up at him and missed the slowly spreading smile pulling her lips apart.

"Are you…" Rulindil bristled.  
No. No this wasn't happening. He was a fully grown Altmer, the interrogator for the Aldmeri Dominion, he feared nothing and nobody. A breeze shifted the pine needles around him and deafened him with the affable sounds they made. He felt humiliation somewhere in the back of his mind but it was overwhelmed by fear as the branches lazily swayed and to his mounting dread he heard what could only be described as a _squeak_ weasel out of his throat just as she confirmed what he'd desperately tried to deny.

"You're scared of heights!"  
"I am no such thing!" Imani began to snicker at how high and swift the retort came out and the foolish inclination to prove her wrong, and get back down to punish her for getting him into these… _inopportune_ situations, caused the Mer to grip the nearly invisible thread of mettle and swipe at the sword. 

He would never admit it, and she would be silenced the moment conversation went in the _abhorrent_ direction in the future, but the moment his hand gripped the sword was the moment he lost balance.  
The moment he found himself clinging madly with one hand to the branch, the moment birds flew from their nearby perches and the Breton below was effectively taken down to her knees in tears.

Rulindil had _screamed_.


	2. Pinata-dil

Imani practically howled in laughter below him but Rulindil found his entire goal in life was to continue living. His feet scrambled against the trunk of the tree and the mer found the unsettling feeling of what could only be described as his heart in his throat as the bottoms of his boots did nothing but scrape off bark. 

"YOU SCREAM LIKE A GIRL!" she snorted, the sound only adding to her entertainment, and he paused. Rulindil reeled his mind back as best he could, overlooking the hammering in his chest, and snapped his gaze down at her.  
"YOU!" he pointed the sword held in a white knuckle grip down at her like an extension of his arm "This is your fault, you sword swinging whore, you will pay for this vile wretch!" Imani didn't seem to care about the cursing, dangling, and embarrassingly terrified Altmer as she curled into a ball and sobbed in laughter for a few moments.  
"For the love of- **STOP LAUGHING**!" Still the Breton continued to roll and smash his robe into the ground in laughter for a few moments more before she _finally_ ceased. 

"You a-are sooooo stuck and scared of heights!" she snorted back another round of laughter as she looked at the weakly seething mer, the terror of Talos worshipers throughout Skyrim, hanging by one hand in the pine. "You!" he flung his free hand up, still clutching the sword, and attempted to pull himself up. Once his chin cleared the branch he curled around it around it to glare down at her  
"You will **never** speak of this!" That painfully and fearfully playful grin split her lips and he swallowed. "Do you hear me?! Where do you think you're going?!" he cursed out loud for how scratchy and high his voice still was. 

Someone, Aedra…Daedra…probably Talos, truly must have _hated_ him. The stick, rather the massive branch, the Breton returned with made him stiffen.  
"Breton!" Imani smiled wickedly.  
"Oh hush! I'm trying to help you!"  
*poke*  
The tip of the branch hardly reached his thigh even with her jumping and he hissed.  
"Cease immediately!"  
*poke*poke*  
"I'm just trying to give you a gentle reassuring caress, Dragon."  
The look he sent her could have spoiled milk.  
*poke* **scowl** *poke* **snarl**  
"Fine, fine, just grab onto the end and I'll ease you back down." he glared down at her sharply."Do you understand physics at all, you s'wit?!" Her brow rose but his insult had only fanned the little devil's glee. 

"Don't want my help?" the branch hit him against his calf hard enough that a small piece of wood was sent flying from the impact.  
"What do you think you're _doing_?!" Imani jumped and again swung the heavy looking branch a bit weaker.  
"I wonder if I hit you hard enough if sweets will come out!" He sneered.  
"Breton!" she swung once more then _thankfully_ tired of swinging the heavy thing. 

Tossing it aside Imani glanced up at him with a smirk.  
"You're really stuck?"  
"No, I find clinging to tree branches wildly endearing and a pass time I enjoy."  
"Oh man, big tough Dragon Mer has turned the sass meter to ten I see. Why don't you just let go?"  
Rulindil grit his teeth.  
"I'd rather have all my limbs in working order for the _punishment_ you'll sustain when I get out of this tree." 

She crossed her arms and tilted her head with a thoughtful look.  
"Or I _could_ just leave you here…" he felt his damned face pale slightly and that smile was back on her lips.  
"Oh don't worry. I won't leave you, but we will have to call a friend to get you down."  
"You will do no such thing!" She frowned.  
"He doesn't even live in Skyrim though! And he can keep a secret, in fact he will take it to his grave, but I _guess_ if you _enjoy_ clinging to that wood rather than _punishing_ little ol' me-"  
"Shut up, stupid Breton! If this friend of yours doesn't live in Skyrim how do you expect to call on him for help?" Imani placed her hands on her hips and Rulindil was painfully aware of the line he was about to cross. 

"I will leave you here." his lips tightened.  
"Call on your friend."She pointed an accusing finger up at him "I have conditions." he groaned and tossed his head back slightly.  
"What?" she grinned.  
"Tell me I'm pretty." He glared down at her as she continued.  
"Tell me I'm pretty and mean it from your heart. And don't just say 'you're pretty' either."  
"You're joking." She turned on her heel and Rulindil gave a humiliating cry of worry. She swung back around with a deceitfully sweet smile.  
"Come again?" Imani _knew_ she was in for it but this was too good. Rulindil focused black eyes ahead of him, shifted on the uncomfortable branch, and took a steadying breath.


	3. Confession

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I might(probably maybe)redo this chapter at some point.

"Br-" no, best call her by name, no matter their healthy habit of referring to the other by nickname.   
"Imani," her brows shot upwards and he glanced down at her softly "little human, painfully annoying Breton" she scowled but said nothing as he continued "I am a mer of few pleasures in life, you being one of them, and I look back on our first meeting with embarrassed sensitivity. Embarrassment for my…attraction to you and embarrassment for having intercourse with you." Imani's lips tightened at the softness in the double meaning of his latter embarrassment. "Ru.." 

"I'm not finished. Your eyes, they are what entranced me first" her posture slackened "your eyes are beautiful, Breton. Most humans in Skyrim have eyes that are pale blue or dirty grey. Your eyes are different, they're like mine, they're unique like you. I had no intentions of growing so fond of you, pesky human, but your personality, your playful and _sweet_ soul…" Rulindil sighed, his fearful situation forgotten as he looked down at the wondrous little Breton staring up at him in awe, and smiled.  
"Beauty isn't outer appearance. Luckily for you, you have nothing to worry about, but your _soul_ , who you truly are, you are the most beautiful creature I've ever encountered, Imani." 

… _what in oblivion is wrong with you_? The mer ignored the incredulous voice in his mind and smiled at her.   
"Rulindil." she wiped her eyes and smiled.  
"Sufficient?" she nodded.  
"Good. Now get me down immediately, human, so I can kill you."   
"If you insist, sweet Dragon Mer." she mumbled with a smirk. 

Rulindil wasn't pleased that he'd shown the human one of his fears. He really wasn't pleased when she called a decaying corpse of what used to be a powerful dragon from the ground to get him down. He absolutely detested the Breton and her damned laughter as the dragon pinched the tunic at his neck with his massive teeth and _held_ him in the air, per her request, so she could 'remember this forever'. 

Little did the Altmer know that in just a few days he'd be subjected to more humiliation in the form of a snowball fight that he'd lose to, that in the coming weeks she'd force him into a game of 'tag', and that in the coming months he'd renounce his rank among the ruling body he'd grown up in and run away with her.

But for now Rulindil settled on getting back to solid ground and getting back at his pesky, bothersome, sweet little Breton.


End file.
